March 11, 2012

Powderpuffs and words

This wasnt really my dress but I reckon my daughter would have preferred it. Image from here

I was fixing up my girls room today…sorting the old to make way for the new. Chapter books to replace the picture ones, small hold-in-your-hand books to replace the ones that would spill across both our laps. We moved on to the wardrobe, glittery leotards pushed hastily back in, shoes without partners and jumpers with zippers hidden where I couldn’t find them.

We were making a box to house the special things that needed a space. The cards from birthdays past full of lovely thoughts, scribbled pictures from a cousin and little trinkets from holidays where we had literally wrung all of the fun out of the days. At the top of the wardrobe we found a spot for the special box, it brushed up against a big Macy’s bag from a trip I took centuries ago. She asked what was in it, so I lifted it down and we both peered in.

‘There’s a lot of pink mum’ she commented and there was, layers and layers of it. It was my wedding dress from my first wedding. A big powderpuff of pink, a giant skirt with 7 layers and a tiny pink corset that sat just above the pink explosion. She pulled it out gasping at the sheer size of it. I waited for the questions and they flowed out as Id predicted…who was there, did I like the dress, was it hard to dance in, did your boobs fall out?? We chatted for a while as she danced around in it. She asked me to put it on and I said no, that I couldn’t. The last time Id slipped the skirt over my legs, the last time my mum tied the back while I put on some lippy, the last time I wore it I wasn’t the person I am now. There is too much space between then and now. I dont really even remember who that person was.

I could reminsce but I couldnt step back. We both bent down, folded it over and put it away.

Do you want me to keep for you for when you get older?

No thanks mum, its not mine.

Tonight Im linking up with the lovely Eden whose talking about the power of words. If I had to stand up and a party and share words Id always choose the ones that arent prepared, that dont need practice, Id just choose the ones that spill out when I open my mouth. Its the people around me that teach me the most about me not quotes from strangers.

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